Tia Nicole Haynes’ Promises

On February 1, 2020February 1, 2020 By Nicholas KlacsanzkyIn Tanka3 Comments

another pear
rots in our fruit bowl
the promises
we choose
not to keep

– Tia Nicole Haynes (USA)
Published in Frameless Sky, 11

The pear could be symbolizing comfort and inner peace which one gets through the sweetness of life. This tanka perhaps revolves around the choices we make to get that inner peace.

So, another pear rotting in the fruit bowl means the circumstances and choices are not appropriate for gaining inner peace and comfort in life. We make certain promises in life to do things that bring happiness and peace in our lives–especially the ones where the focus of control is our inner self. But, due to certain circumstances, we are not able to carry out those promises we make with ourselves. That makes life so uncertain in many ways that we forget to taste the inner peace, as it gets spoiled and rotten by limited choices.

There is a continuous process of striving for inner peace, which is the ultimate goal of our lives and we really wish to keep things in line with our ultimate goal and make promises every year for it. But, life in certain ways puts us through trials and we forget that ultimate goal.

In terms of sound, the letter ‘o’ could indicate the life cycle that makes us deal with different matters of life but also forgetting the ultimate goal.

– Hifsa Ashraf (Pakistan)

This tanka contains a comparison: the promises we choose not to keep are like another pear rotting in our fruit bowl. They are visible, the stench is clear, yet we decide not to abide by our word. This is a part of human nature. Though promises that are left behind stare us in the face, we somehow have the will to let them go sometimes.

The degradation of a pear is an apt symbol: they are sweet but easily bruise and go rotten, just like promises.

Like Hifsa, I enjoyed the “o” sounds in this tanka. I also thought the “r” sounds lend to a serious tone. Additionally in the technical vein, the poet is highly efficient with her words and allows each line to breath in its simplicity and power.

– Nicholas Klacsanzky (USA)

If you enjoyed this tanka and commentary, please leave a comment.

Terry-Wise-2018-Pear-on-Handmade-Bowl-24-x-28-orig-web

Painting by Terry Wise

Lori Ann Minor’s Last Orchid

On December 3, 2019 By Nicholas KlacsanzkyIn Tanka1 Comment

uprooting
the last orchid
from its pot
I accept
my infertility

– Lori Ann Minor (USA)
First Place Winner, 2019 Mandy’s Pages Tanka Time Contest

The crisp pacing of this tanka brings out the starkness of the imagery. Succinctly, Lori zeroes in on a single act and relates that to her state of being. You can say the poet felt the Japanese aesthetic of “aware,” which relates to an object or thing conjuring emotions when perceiving it.

It seems that the poet finds a moment of connection between an orchid and herself, maybe symbolically. This kind of sentiment is expressed in Japanese poetry often and is a highly effective way of conveying a state of being. Instead of elaborating about oneself or others, poets of Japanese forms allow plants and animals to embody who they are.

Maybe the poet looked at the uprooted orchid, in all its beauty and frailty, and spontaneously had a sense of acceptance about her infertility. Or, maybe this acceptance came well after the fact. It does not matter so much about the time frame. What is significant is that readers can instantly feel the power of the words while reading this tanka. The emotion with which the poem was written is effectively conveyed, and that is the most a poet can wish for. A piece of themselves is passed onto the reader and so, the poet lives on in those who read their work.

I enjoy the humbleness of this poem. It gives the feeling that a plant and a person are not so far apart. In a way, the orchid becomes a conduit through which Lori can find acceptance. In this sense, the orchid is a martyr without even knowing it is.

The main sound I hear in the tanka is the repetition of “t.” It might mimic the “tick” or “thud” of an orchid being uprooted. Also prevalent is the use of “o,” which slows down the pace to allow the reader to take in the tanka to a greater extent.

The first line standing as “uprooting” makes the experience of imagining the poem more intense. From there on, the line breaks are more standard but well done.

A poignant tanka that uses excellent pacing, sound, and imagery to deliver a feeling straight from the poet to the reader.

– Nicholas Klacsanzky (USA)

Did you enjoy this tanka and commentary? If so, please leave a comment.
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Pravat Kumar Padhy’s Wave

On November 12, 2018 By Nicholas KlacsanzkyIn Tanka5 Comments

wave after wave
on an incessant journey
another sunset
when I long to change the taste
of salt, the colour of the wind

I feel that this tanka is about a hardship that a person is passing through. “Wave after wave” means shifting from one painful event to another, which seem like trials. But, the writer is persistently going through this journey, no matter how much time it takes.

I can also see that the person is fed up with his monotonous life and wants to change his circumstances, and the conditions that surround him.

Spiritually, it describes the endless journey of hardship where one discovers his or her true potential/abilities to change what he or she does not want to see or wish. Both salt and wind are quite significant in spirituality, as both significantly influence the mood and behavior of a person. I can see the person is still not getting on this path, as sunset indicates hopelessness, but also the awakening of hidden powers that can impact our aura. Overall, the writer beautifully disguised both spiritual and social lives in this tanka.

– Hifsa Ashraf (Pakistan)

The feeling I’m overwhelmed with when reading this poem is a sort of breathlessness, with which the author seems to be trying to deal with. Sometimes life runs faster than us, challenging us to cope, to change, to follow the current of it… to me, it’s a poem about a humble human being, absorbed by the pressing and routine of time (incessant journey…. another sunset….) and the wish to feel free from material perception, which can lead to a more spiritual condition… Impermanence here is the red thread that runs through the tanka: of the beauty of nature, of human perceptions. I do feel all the tension to be more than a soul slave of the perceptions of its body, so a wish to go beyond flesh and bones and find peace of mind, an inner thoughtless shining silence.

– Lucia Fontana (Italy)

I think the two most important words in this tanka that trigger poetic symbolism and concepts are “journey” and “sunset.” A journey in this context could be one’s life, or a spiritual ascension. “Sunset” could be referencing an end of a period of time in one’s life.

I like the gradual pace of the tanka, and the astonishing, yet simple last line. The pace is reminiscent of the subject at hand. In terms of the last line, I believe the writer is expressing his dissatisfaction with the way things are in his life—even rudimentary things. In a sense, he seems to want to break out of reality.

The format of the tanka is the traditional idea of having the first three lines as short, long, short, and the last two lines being long. The poet uses this format well, and does not make the tanka heavy.

I like the use of “w” sounds in the first and last lines, which mimics the wind. The “s” sounds throughout the tanka can be said to be like the noise of waves. Other than this subjective impression, it makes the poem more musical and magnetizing.

An engaging, efficient, and deeply expressive tanka.

– Nicholas Klacsanzky (Ukraine)

waves