grandpa’s coat
a loose button dangling
from a thread

— Sandip Chauhan (USA)
Published in haikuKATHA, issue 36, October 2024

Commentary from Hifsa Ashraf:

This haiku reflects miseries, the carefree life in old age, or memories of a deceased person. Grandpa’s coat symbolizes the protection of the body but it’s not clear that the coat is hanging somewhere, in the closet, or the person is wearing it. In any case, it looks like a close association with the person and the coat. 

The loose button dangling from a thread describes the vulnerability in old age, where a person gets weak and powerless in many ways. Life becomes more predictable as the person is close to annihilation. There may be two aspects: one is a carefree life as a person doesn’t bother to take care of himself or be attentive to self-grooming and another is loneliness where no one is around to take care of the person or his belongings. In any case, the poet beautifully depicted old age which may be the same for many around us. 

separating strands
from gum —
first grade crush

— Lisa Reynolds (Canada)
First Frost, issue #7, 2024

Commentary from Jacob D. Salzer:

This poem is relatable to many people who had a crush at such an early age. For this poet, it may even be her first crush. The first two lines depict the emotional and psychological tension the poet is wrestling with, especially in the words “separating strands.” The sticky qualities of gum could also lead readers to think about emotional and psychological attachments in general. What exactly is a crush? Who do we attach to, and why? What are the consequences of our emotional and/or romantic attachments? This haiku is a portal into these questions and into the mind of a first-grade child who is innocent and vulnerable. It’s also interesting to observe how a single object (in this case, gum) can conjure up memories from long ago and transport readers back in time. An interesting haiku that focuses on child psychology and emotions.

cherry blossoms…
a war refugee
empties his pockets

— Neena Singh (India)
Sakura Award, Vancouver Cherry Blossom Contest 2024

Commentary from Nicholas Klacsanzky:

Cherry blossoms are a traditional Japanese kigo or seasonal reference to spring. They are often seen as a symbol of the elegance, splendor, and fleetingness of things. Because of the commonplace usage of this kigo, it isn’t easy to write an original haiku when mentioning cherry blossoms. However, I think the poet here rendered a new image, and one with energy and feeling.

The imagery could be interpreted in multiple ways. The blossoms could be falling from the refugee’s pockets, or the refugee emptied his pockets so that the blossoms could fit into pockets either by falling into them or by picking them up and putting them there. Either way, the imagery is poignant and points to the beauty of transience. Furthermore, the haiku beautifully contrasts the season of spring with being a war refugee.

I enjoy the ellipsis as it not only slows down the reader to take in the scene of cherry blossoms but also directs us to imagine the cherry blossoms floating in the wind. In addition, it delineates the haiku into a two-part structure so there is no confusion and the association between the parts of the haiku is clearer.

Though the haiku does not follow the English-language standard of a short line/longer line/short line rhythm (optional anyway), it does focus on the principle of brevity with only eight words. Also, the poet employed clear and simple language, which aligns with haiku tradition. There is also euphony with the weight of the “r” sounds and the lightness of the “o” sounds. This brings a contrast and balance to the reading of the haiku.

All the above-mentioned attributes of this haiku demonstrate why it won a Sakura Award at the Vancouver Cherry Blossom Contest. More than that, war refugees have been prevalent throughout history—especially now. This haiku can speak to readers through the ages up to the present time.

Japanese woodblock print (nishiki-e); ink and color on paper. Public Domain. Unknown artist.